[Vendor Review] Junkie_Jesus on Alphabay, 1g meth, $54

Details
Vendor: [Junkie_Jesus]
Market: [Alphabay]
Product: [1 gram Methamphetamine]
Shipped from: [USA]
Shipped to: [USA]
Required FE: [NO]
Vacuum Sealed: [YES]
Decoy: [NO]
Handwriting: [NO]
Rating
Communication: [10] / 10
Stealth: [7] / 10
Shipping time: [10] / 10
Price value: [10] / 10
Aesthetics: [10] / 10
Weight: [10] / 10
Quality: [10] / 10
Transaction: [10] / 10
Vendor: [10] / 10
Drug: [10] / 10
TOTAL SCORE: [97] / 100

TLDR: Was it good meth? I'll give you a hint: look how fucking long this review is. Holy shit sticks it's so long.

Best shipping ever. Amazing product. Great communication. Stealth was adequate but could be better.

 

Junkie_Jesus is better known as therealjunkiejesus on Black Bank, but has expanded to Alphabay, my preferred market. I've never bought from him before on either site, and he was having a new vendor sale.

$20 for 0.5 grams. If you bought a gram, it dropped to $48 plus $6 for shipping. $54 total for a gram of meth.

 

I'll cut to the chase: What he sent me was easily on par or better than any meth from any vendor I had tried so far. And I've ordered many times from many vendors. LadyJessica, TwistyTheClown, Xinhai, DrWhite, Icehouse/KushMaster, NarcoticsAnonymous, Instagram to name a few. This was better than all of the batches from all of those vendors save Twisty, it was probably a match for the best of Twisty's batches.

I have a high meth tolerance and definitely had not had any sort of meaningful break in consumption, JJ's shit was really just good shit. BUT, I was probably the first or second person to buy from him on Alphabay. Which hopefully changes nothing, but I can't vouch one way or another on that.

Combine the quality with the price, and it's probably the best meth purchase I've ever made on the darknet. But wait, there's more!

 

HE SHIPS LIKE HE'S NOT FUCKING RETARDED! A feat I thought impossible for meth vendors. At least, until today. This great day in history. JJ has fucking normal ass shipping that takes normal fucking amounts of time and costs normal fucking amounts of money and then it fucking comes like normal god damned motherfucking priority mail. Not 5-7 days. Not some bullshit that manages to fuck up priority mail hard enough that its twice as slow as first class because it was mailed from some mailbox in Alaska that only semi-trained mooses (meese?) can reach.

Just normal priority mail. Costs $6 or $7, like priority mail. Says it will take 1-3 days. You know, like priority fucking mail. Then it actually fucking came in 1-3 days. 3 days in my case. He shipped it the same day I ordered, and sent a message actually telling me when it would come (wednesday or thursday, and he was correct, that's when it came). The thing that is really something else though, is both in that message as well as written on his vendor info page, he says to message him if its been 3 days and your order hasn't come. He ENCOURAGES customers to message him asking about orders. After just three mail days. Shit in my mouth and call me Günther, I've NEVER seen a vendor do that. Every other vendor seems to tell customers NOT to message them until a stupidly long number of days has passed.

 

Anyway, communication is excellent, and his vendor page and info is actually written with correct grammar, punctuation, capitalization, all that shit, and for some reason, vendors who are the type of person/group that cares about that stuff seem more trust worthy to me.

 

I've already ordered another gram from him, it should come tuesday or wednesday. When it does, I will update this review with part 2 and pictures. Just to see if my experience is repeatable. Note, his prices are still very good but have gone up a bit, and will probably continue to go up, he is clear in the description that these are new vendor prices, but that's to be expected.


Comments


[8 Points] None:

What a pathetic shill job.

Also, you've made it pretty obvious that JesusJunkie is TwistyTheClown's new account, so thanks for that.


[3 Points] Vendor_BBMC:

Its a 10/10 for quality is it? The highest purity uncut meth in the world?


[2 Points] None:

what are you talking about stealth was bad? when I ordered a gram from Junkie Jeebus, he actually packaged the meth inside a hooker's snatch. now you might say "thats not good stealth!!!" but let me tell you that hooker was FINE! on top of that, he even paid for me to bang the hooker as long as I wanted!! and the next day, I got a call from the bank saying my house had been paid off !!! then I noticed all my cysts has been removed!!! now THAT is what I call service!

shillshill / (shill - shill) = SHILLFINITY


[2 Points] beemty:

Ive been doing this stuff 40 years on and off and have ordered from DN markets and this was way by far the lowest quality meth, but some pretty good quality cut. I guess its not cut if its 100% cut its just somthing thats not meth. Im sure it could fool some people, noobs for sure,and Im sure there a lot of them, someone that doesnt know what real meth is. So was junkie Jesus was telling the truth when he apologized about getting a bad batch? I mean this wasnt a bad batch, it was a batch with very little or no meth in it and matched every indication of msm, , the looks, the effect, the way it burns and what it does to the pipe. So what I learned is JJ is either very stupid for buying this bad batch or hes a lying scammer. I was going to cut him some slack if he made up for his blunder and send me somthing from a good batch, if he ever has one. But just an apology for their screw up, and leaving me with nothing for 55 bucks. To be fair I must say shipping was very fast and well done, tho mine didnt even come with one of them hot hos, they decided to screw me a different way. Communications were very good until I brought the problem to their attention and after their apology they totally stopped responding to any msgs. regarding some way of making it up. And its all over now baby blue..


[1 Points] Chilled_DNM:

Is this guy still selling? Does he ship to Aus?


[1 Points] Mammothcave828:

I ordered some Roxi ( whole bunch) last Saturday and he communicated Monday said it'd be shipped Tuesday and I should not freak out till wed or third. Well it's Saturday and I'm freaking that I lost all our money and got scammed.hasnt written back in days either. Argh!!!!


[1 Points] TheRealJunkieJesus:

Why are there so many people talking shit? Just because some of you have had bad experiences with other vendors doesn't mean this is too good to be true.