I have early-stage multiple sclerosis and right now one of my main symptoms is extreme chronic fatigue, to the point that I sleep 12-14 hours a day on the average (20 on the weekends.) Three times now I have slept through my alarms, I have three of them, ringing for more than an hour and been late for work. My employer is aware of my condition, which is medically diagnosed and documented, but I recently got a bad written evaluation for excessive absences (2 to 3 days a month) and for "underperforming" when I am present. I'm going to lose my job if I get another bad evaluation and if I lose my job, I lose my insurance and probably my house and everything else.
I need a drug that will keep me awake and keep me productive whether my body wants to or not. From what I gather, you can get anything on the dark net. I'm hoping for advice on what to get. I don't know anything about recreational drugs in general, I just know I have gone to both my regular doctor and my specialist and begged them for help and they both just tell me "that's the way it is, it's only going to get worse" when I ask for something to help me stay awake so I can go to work and do my job properly. Since they won't help I'm desperate for other solutions. Does meth keep you awake and make you productive? It looks like it from tv. Speed? Are there different types of speed? I saw something about "crank", would that do it? How much do people take? I don't know where to start even, but I know I'm going to lose my job in a few months if I can't get this figured out. I don't want to get high as such, I just have to stay awake and stay competent for at least eight hours a day. Please, any advice from people who know more than me is welcome, I'm terrified of losing my job and it's going to happen if I can't fix this. My company already wants to get rid of me for having a chronic illness.
Speed seems a little to excessive right off the bat. Have you tried lighter stuff.. such as modafinil?