1. **Setting**
* `Vendor` - Pelican USA
* `Market` - Off Market DD
* `Product` - Medium Sized bbq chicken pizza
* `Price` - 0
* `Countries` - USA 2 USA
2. **Vendor**
* `Service` - Excellent
* `Shipping` - Extremely fast, got to me less than 30 mins after order confirmed
* `Stealth` - 0/10, no vac seal, no MBB, was clearly a pizza. Saw the logo on the box, and I could smell it as soon as I opened the door, but it got to me
* `Security` - Encryption was used
* `Communication` - very quick. Vendor and I exchanged for 20 minutes
3. **Product**
* `Weight` - on weight, size medium
* `Purity` - very pure, absolutely no adulterants
* `Potency` - Extremely potent, pizza was cooked extremely well
* `Price Value` - Got it for free
* `Aesthetic` - Wonderful
4. **Comments:**
So I have done a bit of business with Pelican in the past...
First time was a deal for some DNP
So when I expressed interest in doing another cycle of steroids, I went with Pelican when he said he could get them for me. The package of steroids should have landed yesterday, but shipping has been slow. Last night when I messaged Pelican asking where the pack he told me to check back in with him today. The pack still hadnt landed, so he told me he will reship. If I get both, it just means I get some extra he said. I was pleased with this, but then this guy decides to take it to the next level by asking if I want some pizza.
Do I want pizza?
Hell fucking yes I want some pizza
He gave me a list of ingredients and told me which ones I wanted. At first I asked for chicken and bacon, but then decided I wanted BBQ chicken and he said he could do it. Fuck yea. He asked if medium was ok. God damn right it is. Then asked if I wanted pepsi or mtn dew. I am diabetic, I told him this. He said woah, pespi could have killed me! He ordered my diet pepsi instead, but he recommended that I reagent test it. Saftey first!
Pizza literally got here in 20 minutes. Top that USPS, a 20 year old pot head that delivers pizza gets me my shit faster than you. When the pizza got here there was no stealth. No vac seal, no mbb, no decoy, and strong pizza smell. Make sure that you have a secure drop!
Food Report
Yesterday I bought some God Bud wax at a local dispensary. Once he told me I had a pizza on the way I kinda thought he was joking, but I loaded up my vape with the wax just in case and started puffing on it a bit. Kind of tastes like fruit loops. It's decent wax. By the time I heard the doorbell ring I was pretty damn high. I noticed the build up of saliva in my mouth and quickly felt shame in the fact that I was the personification of Pavlov's stupid fucking dogs. I shook the thought of that off and ran to the door. Gave the guy a couple bucks as a tip and brought the pie upstairs. I sat down before I grabbed a glass for the diet pepsi. Fuck. I was too high to go get another one. I popped the cap off the 2 liter and decided to drink straight from the bottle. Turning the fuck up this Tuesday. I opened the box and there were huge strips of chicken and lovely cheese, all accented by the bbq sauce in color. What a sight to see. I shook up the small container of garlic butter to make it thick and consistent. I pealed off the cover and dipped a single slice of pizza into it to taste. It was at the perfect temperature where the cheese doesn't slide off, but is still melty enough to have the prime flavor. I ate the whole thing in one sitting. Too good not to. God damn, Pelican pulls through too much for me. I can't handle it.
This fucking guy has gotten me a flat stomach with his DNP, a girlfriend, some memorable nights while high as fuck off ecstasy, and today this fucking guy, he bought me fucking lunch and dinner.
Pelican is cool as hell. Great vendor, extremely responsive. He's one of those guys you don't have to worry about when sending your money because he always comes through. Then, on the off chance that something happens and he can't pull through, he does some shit like buys you pizza and sends you a reship. Both of those things. Steroids, ecstasy, molly, pizza, Adele's newest album, counterfeit bills, DNP, Pelican has it all.
EDIT: PICS PICS
EDIT 2 I just wanted to give a thanks to /u/SuicideChrist who enjoyed this so much he gilded it. You da bomb. Also thanks to /u/Pelican_Vendor for fattening me the fuck up so I have to buy more of his DNP
hahahahahahah I tried so hard not to fucking laugh. The ending about my Adele listing made me laugh so hard d I think I peed a little.
No_Steroids_Gets_Pizza