[OPSEC] Money Laundering Cont.

This is a continuance of the thread I started a few days ago, asking the general population what they thought was the best way to clean money.Now I need the community's opinion once again. I've gone ahead and registered a LLC with the state, got my Fed Tax ID, now I could use some expertise on "cooking the books." I figure using quickbooks plus their payroll system would be the best way, any objections or better ideas?? Thanks for your time!


Comments


[3 Points] Theeconomist1:

Have you figured out how to get the cash into your business?

If you don't have an accountant, the quickbook payroll system is usable. I certainly wouldn't want ot manually calculate that shit. It makes it easier for sure.

Don't forget to create an EFTPS account so you can pay SS online.

Don't forget to get applicable insurance. If you want to pretend to be a legit business, most legit businesses need a general liability insurance policy. You'll need to get one according to the industry standards of the business you are pretending to be. They can be cheap depending on the work you are claiming. A $1MM general liability policy will probably run about 300-600/year for a basic, low risk type business. All depends what you are fronting to be.

Make sure you understand when you need to file taxes. Corporations need to pay quarterly. Make sure you understand the state's requirements as well. Every state is different in terms of what filings are required and when/if payments are due.

To open a bank account, most banks will need corporate papers. You will need Articles of Incorporation/Organization. You might also need a resolution stating that you are given permission to open a bank account.


[1 Points] None:

I wash with solvents to get the cocaine off my money. Once purified, I throw it in the washer/drier to give it a nice fresh smell; you know, no one likes money that smells like ass. Was hanging on a clothes line to dry but I had to chase the black kids in my neighborhood away with a broom. When my white neighbor first saw me doing this, I had to explain that I kept forgetting to empty my pockets on laundry day. Use a rock tumbler for loose change. If you're talking about bitcoin, put your girlfriend up on a cam site and spend it all on her. Let her cash it out and bring home the dough and claim her tip heheh


[1 Points] gotthatgreenthumb:

Biggest thing you need to remember is you need to be keeping invoices. And you also need to find a way to generate receipts so at the end of the year when it comes time to files taxes so you can justify any deductions you ask for. I'd sit down and talk to an accountant for a general consultation. Also helps to talk to a tax attorney if you have any questions related to how and when to pay taxes federally and in state. You'll want to make quarterly estimated tax payments to the feds. You probably should have opened your LLC in a state like deleware, florida, etc so you didnt have state taxes to worry yourself with.

This is why most folks are serious when they say open a laundromat. It's a cash business so it's basically "this is what I made" without having to have a bunch of invoices for jobs and what not and then "this is what I spent" to cover rent, utilities, equipment repairs, etc.

(this is coming from having an LLC for tax purposes on an un-reported cash income. If you have a chase branch nearby their business accounts are legit.)


[1 Points] DNM-Accountant:

Since you are based in the US by your company I would definitely follow /u/TheEconomist1's advise. This is a very solid start for trying to stay below the radar.

Since you started an IT company have you started considering how you will funnel the dirty money into the business without raising suspicion?

This type of business will probably not be able to sustain big amounts of cash coming in. There is a possibility for making a straight up service for bitcoins.

If you have any questions feel free to PM for further conversation.


[1 Points] KnewGuiy:

The questions about money laundering are well deserved. It is an extremely complex and important part of ever being successful in the criminal world. Keeping the feds off you ass is important and if you don't pay your taxes then you start facing problems. The real key is being low key, not filtering a large amount of money. Laundered funds should be like 10% or 15% of your total revenue. I mean hell you could totally increase it. A lot of people do and get away with it. However money laundering or anything criminal in nature is only successful if you get away with it. Regardless of profit, as long as you are a free man you are still up one. You can try to create invoices or create sales depending on your company. Service based companies or product based companies work. I have no expirience. SWIM is a CPA and has given me advice from time to time. He tells me that online payments for overseas sales can be easily falsified because creating a bank account in those countries is much easier. Offshore companies can purchase goods or services, and you can "send" them what they paid for. If it happens to be an empty box it is, but as far as the feds know it was a box full of motherboards. Just don't get caught with excess inventory if you are laundering money. If you get audited and they take count of what you have on hand and it doesn't match what you say it should be=get fucked.


[0 Points] Vendor_BBMC:

Don't call ME a money laundering cont! Am I eckers like, you daft ha'perth

Money cleanliness is next to godliness