Community,
One of the things I miss when I first came here was the comraderie of the community. It was much smaller, less transient, and obviously the sub has grown since then. There wasn't as much vitriol for one another, posts were informative and/or humorous. Back then, when I came to the sub, I was excited to see what the hell everyone was up to. I know its not going to go back to how it was back then, but fuck it, I figured I'd see if we could get a little more sense of community around here. I figured a little Q&A might be fun. I'll start it off and put some questions. Feel free to answer as many or few questions as you want. Or make up your own!
- How'd you find this sub?
- What is your biggest personality weakness?
- What is your DoC?
My Answers
Quite randomly. Years and years ago, I had never heard of the DNMs. I'm older and not in tune with this sort of thing. Social media came a bit after my time even. Shit tightened up with pill mills, laws clamped down, and my sources IRL were either getting arrested or retiring. I didn't really deal with dealers - it was more doctors, crooked pharmacies, that sort of thing. So things were getting shitty and I happened to read an article in "Wired" or somewhere that talked about dealing on Instagram. I'd never used that app, so there I went. Sure enough found plenty of sellers but it seemed all scammy. I messaged on other buyer who'd been trying for months and he got scammed like every time. LOL. Not sure why he kept trying. Then someone posted a comment and said to check out this sub and here I came. Never left.
This one is easy for me. I'm the king of stubborness and pride. Over the years, I've destroyed relationships b/c of this flaw. Probably the biggest was the girl I was engaged to years before I got married (to another woman). I was absolutely in love with her and she with me. She was gorgeous - 5'9", perfect body, funny, smart, nice, overall just a sweet girl. We got engaged and it was a long engagement b/c she was younger than me and figured she should finish up college and all. For reasons I don't even remember, we started arguing and things I guess just built up. My stubbornness and pride wouldn't let things go. Things got worse. She put up with a lot of shit from me. Ironically enough, I was the one who broke up. It was so counter to what I actually wanted deep down. But that damn pride and stubbornness. She tried to get back together over the following year but I just wouldn't. I refused. For things that were so minor that I can't even remember why we were even arguing since we never had any real problems in our relationship. I was so in love with her that it really took years for me to completely get over her - which ironically I could have solved by just giving her a call. But I never did. I still remember our last conversation when we broke up and I never spoke to her again after that. I look back and wonder why I sabotaged something I had wanted so badly. But that's just me. Once I have my mind set on something or I get pissed in a relationship, I don't revert back. Its one that I have never really conquered and haven't really tried to. But its definitely a shitty personality quirk. LOL. But things work out as they always tend to in spite of me. But I kind of ironically laugh that I put myself through hell and could have fixed everything with a single conversation with her.
Opioids! Love them. Have been using for a really long time now. My favorite is hydrocodone and oxy. I tend to do more hydrocodone but oxy tends to give me opirage for some reason. But watch out for them. You think you won't get dependent on them, and hopefully you never do, but it creeps up on you. It did for me. And I am pretty strong willed but this got me in the end.
1- I've been here since SilkRoad. I had heard of Reddit but once I saw people talking about the SR sub, I got on Reddit and my life changed forever! I fell in love with the whole site very quickly and the SR and DNM subs became my homes. I lurked for a while then made an account and many throwaways before finally making this account to stick with as my only account.
2- I am extremely intelligent and yet over the years I have continuously done stupid things that have brought massive amounts of disappointment to my friends and family. Random trouble, graffiti, drug dealing, drug addiction, all kinds of shit. I have more problems than anyone in my large family and I am struggling to get back on the right path to mend a multitude of relationships.
3- Marijuana everyday and I am a heroin addict trying very hard to finally quit the shit for good. So far I am failing but hopefully I find some therapy soon to help me. Those are my main drugs but I love acid (obviously) and I dabble in just about every class of drugs. A drug trash can if you will.