Silk Road forums

Discussion => Drug safety => Topic started by: flyinghigh1660 on September 24, 2011, 12:50 pm

Title: I just met Dimitri
Post by: flyinghigh1660 on September 24, 2011, 12:50 pm
First of all I would just like to thank Walter for his excellent services.

Background: I'm middle aged, spent early life taking speed and XTC, kept chasing that first pill high, was never going to regain it. Gave it all up moved onto Mary Jane recently. Never done any psychedelic before. Found out about DMT from another forum when researching LSD. As soon as I read trip reports I just knew that I wanted to try it. It was an all consuming passion which lead me to the wired article and silk road. I was apprehensive I have a strong atheistic thread in me, against all organised religion, would this change me? Would I become unrecognisable?

My beliefs were so strong that in fact they where a part of my identity. I was scared about giving that up, what if it changed me beyond all recognition? However I have always believed that if you challenge your beliefs you either make them stronger or have a new set to understand. I thought that perhaps taking DMT would also lead me to understanding of life, remove some of the baggage that I carry with me, wash away some of the lost feelings that I had.

The other night I built a light bulb vaporiser, I had read all the advice about vaporising it. Taking 3 good tokes and letting go. Read trip report after trip report, watched videos on youtube. Thought I was ready, thought I knew what was coming. I did not know, how can you know? No one can. It's a game changer, an awakening. DMT is not a drug, to say it is a drug is to mislabel it. It is a gift.

Last night, vaporiser in hand I had measured 50mg out, lit it, tried to inhale it all, coughed and lost most of it. Some nice body feelings, very slight visuals. It was all quickly lost. I tried again, this time stronger visuals. My apartment started breathing, rushing through my body. Great closed eye visuals fractals, snakes, patterns. A presence was there urging me to come with her, it was defiantly a she. Again not enough I stumbled and fell. A slight anxiousness filling me, I nearly let go and if I did it again would I be lost and never come back?

This morning I had the last of my small amount left. This time I packed the bong with leftover ash, grinding some herb to place on top. The sun streams through my apartment in the morning and it really is a nice feeling even not high. I was naked and thought why not. I feel comfortable lets do it.

I kept the flame above the weed, using my breath to draw it down and light it. I dragged in a good lungful, the taste not as chemical as the previous night. Letting it out the buzzing started. I had some youtube music that some one had done for a trip playing through the iPad, I took  another hit looked into the mirror. Saw myself for who I really am, saw my soul looking back at me. I was clean, energetic, vibrating.

I laid back on the bed, the room warping, the curtains a strong purple colour, started to breath. I closed my eyes, I opened my arms and asked her to take me, to show me. Patterns of light colours, I have a limited vocabulary to describe it, rushing by

The warm and security enveloped me, wrapped me, cradled me. She took me with her, a goddess radiant in beauty. She was the universe, she was trying to show me the light, taking me towards the warmth. Telling me that we are all one, I opened my eyes again, afraid, I wanted to be grounded a little, the dark was off to my left I did not want to go there. She told me it was OK, follow the light come back with me. I closed my eyes again I was nearly there, she was trying to show me the universe. Telling me that there is nothing to be scared of, that I could see it, it was in me and all of us, we are all one, we are all energy.

My 2 tokes had ensured that I could not go all the way with her, I had to go back. I wanted to stay but I had to go back.

But it is not bad, coming back. I now know, I know, it is still not about God and religion. These are poor concepts for a human invention, it is about life. I understand, I was given a glimpse of the beyond. The connection that we have with everything, the hope, and there is no need to be scared any more.

Will I travel again,  to see where I will be taken? Oh yes.

My eyes are opened, my beliefs challenged and now adapted to this new reality, and I am forever grateful for it.



Title: Re: I just met Dimitri
Post by: Woger on September 27, 2011, 03:33 am
Welcome to the universe! :)