Silk Road forums

Discussion => Newbie discussion => Topic started by: falerin on August 23, 2013, 10:27 pm

Title: Suggestions for Dealing With Crushing Disappointment and Depression
Post by: falerin on August 23, 2013, 10:27 pm
This post is half serious, half jest.

Likewise it is half rant and half inquiry.

I am interested in feedback from buyers but even more so from vendors, since this involves my buyer-vendor relations and I can only see it from the buyer perspective at the moment.

So I placed an order last week and selected Express Mail as my shipping method for which I paid a premium. I had hoped to get the package to celebrate my birthday at midweek alas no dice. And now it looks like this weekend is a wash too.

This tied up almost a whole BC with this vendor and I live paycheck to paycheck enough that I have little spare money to invest in such things idly. I am now flat broke until my next payday.

My previous priority order with this vendor also had slow shipping times but clearly that issue was with the USPS who sent my mail the wrong direction and locked in a potal loop.

The vendor also more than corrected for the issue even though I FE'd not by request of the vender but through my own accidental stupidity.

That was readily identified by tracking. Unfortunately I have no tracking for this. SilkRoad reports the package was marked in transit on Tuesday

The vendor himself reports it was sent earlier like Sunday night into Monday.

The vendor has fallen silent as well and has not as far as I can see even read my messages but he has been receiving steady positive reviews from others (though some also comment on the speed) . And an earlier conversation via torchat indicated he was being crushed underneath orders.

This vendor is not fly by night by any means they have many many positive transactions over a long period.

So how long should I reasonably wait for an express shipped package before feeling I am not getting the service I paid for?

I value this vendor and his product and I hardly want to create a bad relationship with him. Worse given the way that buyer feedback is calculated and the fact that I am a newbie to SR entirely I fear killing my own rating so that other vendors wont deal with me. I do not live in a market where I have other sources, do not have the knowledge to find them anyway, and am old enough, having entered the pyschotropic haze later in life, that a street dealer would be a near impossibility anyway.

Its a catch-22, but one I am sure I am in no way unique to.

Of course, unless and until the seller becomes responsive,  I have few options until resolution becomes available.

Meaning that, irritatingly, even though I paid for express the time frame for such is very very long indeed.

So how would you cope with such a situation?

How would you handle the crushing weight of real life in light of such disappointment and depression?

How would you occupy your time in light of the tremendous soul sucking boredom that crushed your  mind?

How would you deal with the vendor in this instance.

Worse I am waiting on packages from another vendor too which is not here either (though that was free first class so I am unsurprised. But this means I am without psychotropic enhancement AT ALL! Woe is me. What am I to do?

Title: Re: Suggestions for Dealing With Crushing Disappointment and Depression
Post by: smokysal on August 23, 2013, 11:08 pm
Baaah. That is a really rubbish situation. I'm only a newbie buyer on here, so probably some thoughts from vendors will be helpful as you say.

Sounds like you just have a slow vendor -- if others are commenting about the speed, and he's made no move to get you to FE, then perhaps he shipped it later than he said. Or perhaps you just got unlucky with the post again. Although a week for "express" delivery is slow, if this guy is inundated with orders he might not consider it a serious problem yet, or at least one that might go away if he ignores it.

Does he post a policy on refunds/reships in his profile? Obviously you're out of pocket, but if he genuinely did send it then he is too.

Mostly replying cos I really really sympathise with expecting goodies to arrive then having them not arrive. I waited 2 weeks for one vendor (not from SR), emailed them, they said "I'm sure it'll turn up". It did, 2 days later, and the tracking code showed they hadn't shipped it until after I emailed. Grr! That was two weekends that I was expecting to avoid sobriety. At least you have some other stuff on the way. Hopefully it'll all arrive soon!
Title: Re: Suggestions for Dealing With Crushing Disappointment and Depression
Post by: falerin on August 24, 2013, 01:10 am
That sort of situation is what I fear though I have no reason at this point to suspect the vendor would do that. Unfortunately now he is not even responding so I have no way to know one way or the other. But given priority express has an overnight to second day guarantee we are at the limit of realistic patience I think. Worse express is expensive to the tune of  a quarter BC expensive. Seems to me that for that price one expects.. oh I dunno the mail to arrive "express"
Title: Re: Suggestions for Dealing With Crushing Disappointment and Depression
Post by: SmokesHisBroccoli on August 24, 2013, 02:06 am
Hey falerin.  I don't know if I have all the answers for you but I'll try to give you my 2 cents based on experiences. 

First off it's a real bummer that you don't have tracking on DCN so you can track your package.  I don't vend so I'm not entirely sure how that works but I believe you have to walk into the post office to get the tracking and a lot of vendors don't want to do that and instead just drop it off in a blue box on a street corner. 

From what I've read on these forums the Express mail is supposedly handled by different people than who normally handles the regular first class and priority mail and I've even read comments where people say the Express mail employees are much worse at their jobs than the normal employees (go figure right). 

The good news is all is not lost with your package.  It could be and probably still is out there somewhere trying to be delivered to you.  If you've never had a package take forever before the first time it happens you're just thinking the worst and that all is lost.  I had a priority package take 8 days about a month ago and I was getting pretty anxious.  Only when I had given up hope that it was coming did it show up.  So your package may still turn up.  But in the future, you do what you want of course, but Express packages should be avoided if at all possible.  They typically only get your package to you a day or two earlier and cost that much more but the biggest factor is how law enforcement looks at Express packages more closely for contraband.  It's possible your package was discovered and destroyed.  Typically you'd get a letter regarding that though. 

To take care of your depression, this may not be your thing, but exercise is a great ally.  It really gets your good chemicals flowing and makes you feel good and sleep good.  Keep doing it on the daily and eat some good food and you won't feel depressed.  If you're in the Northern Hemisphere, get out there and enjoy summer while it's still going on.  Take a walk or a bike or just people watch at the park. 

Finally in regards to the vendor, if you can't prove it was his fault the package didn't show I'd give him the benefit of the doubt.  Wait until the resolve button is available and then message the vendor saying perhaps you'd like to give it a few more days and if the package doesn't show perhaps they'd do a full refund or a reship.  A lot of times the vendor puts their policy for refunds or reships in their profile.  Considering you're living paycheck to paycheck I'd be firm and push for a full refund or reship so you aren't out of pocket.  Hope this helps.